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When double-track

It 's a long time since I do not write us and I think I lost the little they had.
And to think of it I do not know what to write or rather, what I write is one thing, what I write is another.

say that two years have passed and a little more since my professional life has taken a turn (it was the period of "My Tao" ) which then impacted on the rest chain.

Two years ago we closed the studio, I found myself suddenly alone with nothing in hand and not knowing where to bang my head, then came a call for interesting work, of course, accepted, which continued until Last November, when it came another, more interesting and even more clearly accepted, and so here we are.

I know, it Pallos, but I need to get to the point.

So, we said, new experience, professional growth, a lot of fine words and all the kit to the man in full (pseudo) career, but at what price?

While two years ago I was terrified, now I'm scared, while two years ago I was imbufalito for what had happened, and of which I had not minimanente fault, now I feel like a cyclist with leg cramps while still sees no end of the climb, if there is an end.

In addition there is the wedding is close to great strides, but the problem is not that I can not organize it in the sense that we will miss a lot of stuff and also because if they have taken quite a load that is Carmen, realistically, 99% of things.

No, no that is the problem.

The real problem is that my I can not organize it but I wish, I would like to lend a hand to my wife, I would help her when she is tired, I would comfort her when he resigned , cheer when she is sad and so on. But I can not do: I can not help thinking about problems that I have and working 10 hours a day (for months now) can not cancel altogether.

think about it, so in theory it would also be right because, as my boss says, if there were problems we would not exist, our role would be useless. In the hardest moments, my mind refers to He goes by '' a Nutt De Filippo in Naples millionaire, raising the hope that it is only a matter of habit, then you get used to a routine and become , a little 'as the first time that the doctors in the emergency department makes him vomit and then not anymore.

Cause I can accept everything, I can also work on weekends (always mica eh!), But I can not accept the idea to take time, of my time to the person who is always beside me and I often got more than I did myself.

And that's why my next step will be the search for inner growth to become compartmentalized, we have two lives, one personal and one work, the two tracks (parallel) the title of this rambling post reopen the "letters".

Goodnight everyone.

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Flashback off

The street lights shone obscene, unmasking a drizzle invisible. I glimpsed a figure known. He gave large puffs the cigarette, at the entrance of the room. He wore a short skirt and cowboy boots girl crippled. The eyes of blacks, as if they had beaten fresh. She was my woman, for a few months. He continued to smoke with the air chilly and annoyed. And the face of a toxic upset. I went over, not at all embarrassed by my attire: A long pandrana with fur from American pimp. In this place I would be mistaken for a trendy. An eccentric. We said goodbye, she gave me a look full of hatred and contempt genuine.
"Whoever sees ...". He hissed with a wicked smile.
Then inside, sitting at the counter, without feeling we spoke. I knew only one word in five. It was not an unpleasant sensation. You can imagine everything. Guess. Do not feel too much reality. Had attended similar premises, probably would have lasted more with Vicky. I'll call Vicky, but not the name of the case. But it is so American film.
There was dancing in a night afro. Or maybe it was a local African. Basically sounded tribal melodies, and the place was full of blacks. Especially men. And many white native, who looked around with the air virginal and adoring. It looked like a primitive mating dance, the kind you see in the world of quarks. But everything was upside down. Awkward mating rituals of the male in love, and predatory reluctant and dreamy. Then someone went off beaming, coupled with a couple of guys. Vicky also like a lot of young blacks. "They are so sweet and passionate!", Always said, not bothering to show off a bit of racism utilitarian, devoted to the phallus of ebony. And I do not really give a shit. In a way, I admired his sincerity. Denoted a strong character and determination.
I ordered the second vodka. And his eyes m'è seemed less cruel. In the third we would have kissed by accident.
"Where did you find this deal? I do not remember.." Touching the buttons of pandrana curious.
"I put it in 1998. With long hair it was fine..
"because it does not grow back? Wow, as the wild scratched from the bear. "
" O bitten by a rattlesnake unscrewed.. "He laughed
. Even I laughed. We laughed. Unvoiced laughter, empty. Full of a dormant resentment that made no sense.
"But explain to me what purpose did you? I figured the phone, never responds. Explain to me why you have it, that phone? ".
" I see the calls. Now it is home..
"And if you do not recall that the point?".
"None. I told you ... I see who's calling me. Who I wanted to talk. Enough for me. Do you understand? How is it going to the gym? ". He turned his eyes circled the sky. Mica everyone can understand my spiritual intimacy. A black
marcantonio of two meters, shaved and with the lobe of six pounds a chandelier, if you look throughout. Winked. The fucking eyes. It seemed a pimp as an officer and gentleman. What falls from the seventh floor.
"And who is to know him?"
"Yes, I do not see who is at the table with my friends?".
"It 's your boy?".
"No.".
"I'll purposes, then ...".
"No, but what do you care who I am?"..
"Ok, it was to know."
a sinister form of perversion, leads me to imagine the women who were with me while fucking another. I like to know who is after me. I ordered a Mexican torcibudella to 70%, to end in glory or the morgue. A chick stoned, and sweat pants with spotted rubbing be careless. Two asses that have seemed to break out of lust. Then hath been noticed that I was not a Negro, mulatto, and even a beard disguise. And she went on, shaking that ass huge. Up and down. LEFT-dest.
"I finish this and go. I was just down to buy cigarettes. I'm going to enjoy the first of Stakhovsky.."
"Oh how nice, you're given to classical music now?" I think you expect a woman.. "
"It's not a nut dead musician, is a tennis player. He plays tennis.".
"Oh shit! Still ... I think one of those failures who have failed to become something, and continue ...".
"But I did not want to become a tennis player. That is, no less than to be a fireman or pilot..
"You wanted to become a firefighter?".
"No. However, I can not explain how a melodious with the back still has not broken through. A bargain incomprehensible. I tell You, is a coward like me..
"And now you ask questions and you answer yourself? You're on analysis!.. "He rang, through the eyes of mad tangled that is entering the stage of down apathetic.
" You can not understand, are too far for everything..
I saw a little 'uncomfortable. Impatient. It biting her lip. Maybe it meant something.
"Okay, and for the rest?". He tried to change the field passing his hand through his curls.
"The rest compared to what?".
"Oh shit, I hate when you do that! How the fuck you feel like your life?". Become
very sexy when he loses patience. And I like to make them lose their patience. Often it is something unintentional.
"Okay. Everything evolves for the better. Things are turning in the right direction. So it seems.."
"In what way?".
"One day you will say that I made love with the greatest genius of the last three thousand years.".
"Oh my God!" We should stop the madness ... for those with drink tonight. ".
I saluted, watching her go to her table. I recognized those buttocks swaying, trapped in the skirt. I started, and everything was going all so soft and swirling. I almost tripping. Avoided the tumble in lion's skin of the face, with a casual high taxes. The cold, horrible, pierced the bones and cut the skin. It was no more rain, but sleet. A kind of bastard frost, which ran aground in the beard. Just around the corner, I felt my legs collapse. The pride that kept me standing, sag badly defeated. Lying in the dark, and leaning against the wall. I could spend the night. The sky looked like a confused field of deformed and wild orchids. I rocked, complying with indecent thoughts and hysterical laughter.

I raised. Two blocks and cold deserts. Then the bed. Nor is the instinct to masturbate. Meanwhile, Stakhovsky lost. Swept via brutal horror.

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Wonderful poignant

Lydia ran into the bathroom to pee or throw up. Or rinse your cunt. We were only three. On a bed covered with blue sheets in bulk, warm and humid. Sara
m'aveva exhausted riding non-stop and piety, and now it sucked to Paul, all thrilled and excited, lying on its side. Great sound breathless and wet, jaw, lips and tongue horny wise. I devote attention to his hot and sweaty crevices. A sweet slumber to try kidney from a deadly afternoon, his face buried between those impudent buttocks. The language to explore and play with the vicious little hole, leaving let your fingers slip, raping her cunt slowly. Writhing, shaking your ass in time, tightening under the blows of the language. It continued to lap carefully that one. I was stoned, or had a great ass, Sara. One of those which give all the love you have, until the last drop dense. Hard, round and screaming. The tank has run
fuck me again, arrogant and terribly pale blue. I helped to push up on his knees, and Did I placed my ass. Only a depraved rattle, and other suffused intermittent groans, just emerge from the chapel of the other, in a synchronous and obscene nature. The cock continued to slowly sink in that tight hole, but slippery and clear. The secret is the serenity mental. Inhibitions and nervousness, all to be unnecessarily painful effort. The manual says that I will write soon. I've got to push, no un'inculata frenzy. Then
other shots deep, without his wise mouth release the fucking bull of Paul. The phone has got to ring. A nudge old, dull and awful. I drilled the meninges, accompanying the final lunge. Hath been taken away suddenly, bitten to the obscenely final. E 'jumped out of bed like an eel hysterical. He grabbed half of spinel from ashtrays, and two steps were already on the phone. Sitting on a worn sofa dark green color, crammed next to the phone, in the small front hallway. He had all the air to talk someone important. The father, mother, or grandfather. One can not stop something so intense, if not a crucial matter. Or maybe, just fucked out of boredom, like drinking sugar-free orange drink with a straw. I looked at her. He looked happy and moved. Or both. She sat and chatter of a large breath, pulling the mouth to the minor spinel, with her legs wide, that exhibit cunt helpless and unfolded. Red coarse and obscene. The tips of the hair disheveled, her breasts brushing them ended up. Of beautiful breasts, big and velvety, almost without the nipple around a huge pink crown. Her eyes were rimmed, large, restless. A Japanese doll, naked and sloppy. And mad. Paul has run
HAD ENOUGH of waiting and went to the bathroom to fuck Lidia. Or take a shower. It's not a fine observer him. And not even a sophisticated brain lover like me, anyway. I kept looking at her with great romance. I lit a cigarette, scratching the tip of the penis. And 'round, a little more melancholy. The family had to miss a lot, you could see. I pulled over if, and I fucked her cunt. He's coming with his legs grasped behind my back. Taking up what little remained of the spirit of Christmas lights and colorful. Drops of cum tired, laid flat on her belly. I lit another PallMall, observer to the glitter that shone on the navel.
"If I was not so naturally inclined all'esser bitch, you might even esssere my ideal woman, "I thought. But I did not say.